I recently loss much love of my life whom was very sick. I blame myself for not returning home earlier to look after him and when I did. I didnt have enough time to tell I loved him dearly. Since his passing I have tried hard to do everything he asked but it been hard to deal with the grief. I also recently was told that he continued a sexual relationship which he said ended years ago but still I love him wholeheartedly. Did he ever love me as much as I did or was it a sham.